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A young graduate joins a company right after completing college. Within 6 months he starts feeling dissatisfied with the workplace and the work he was asked to do. He is unable to voice his feelings with superiors, leading to anxiety and continuous sense of discomfort. He starts looking around for new jobs.

He quits the moment he gets another job; but soon finds the work environment less friendlier than the earlier one; leading to stress, anxieties affecting his emotional wellbeing and health.

And the dissatisfaction journey goes on ….

“I thought I was going to be enjoying this work I chose, but I am not happy” is a common thought that people share with close friends when such things happen.

Another common story…

A young woman with 10 years’ work experience is working in a large corporate. As the time comes for a key promotion, she finds herself being sidelined, while someone else gets the post. She feels terribly let down, after having put a lot of time and effort in her role at the organization.

She feels a sense of depression and is unable to talk to anyone in the organization about it.

“I feel so frustrated and let down!” she tells her family and close friends.

Emotional Wellbeing impacted by workplace issues

Most people start their working lives looking forward to spending quality time at the workplace, doing interesting work and enjoying interactions with the team. But once they are into regular work, they start encountering different kinds of stresses that impact their emotional wellbeing and can, if not managed in time, start impacting their body and health.

Not enjoying the work on hand; inability to voice with anyone about issues being faced; superiors putting pressure to complete tasks or diverting attention with new agendas; non-cooperative colleagues becoming hurdles; one’s own obsession to get results at any cost; not receiving adequate recognition; inability to give quality time to personal and family life etc. are all commonly seen situations in today’s workplaces.

In all such scenarios, the common side effect is the slow but continuing impact on one’s emotional health and in turn, on physical health.

Job changes are done, but soon, the stresses come back; may be not exactly for the same reasons; but stresses they certainly are.

Adding to these, there could also be personal life issues overwhelming some people and distracting their focus from work and leading to the kind of issues explained above.

Being stress-free while experiencing very busy lives

So what does it mean? Do we just accept that’s life and move on? Or should we take that pause to say “how do I manage my emotional wellbeing and overall health through these situations”?

Some practical steps to handle difficult situations are –

Acceptance: Accepting the reality that hurdles and unexpected turns are a part of life; And that one can choose how to respond to stressful issues.

Visualising: Looking ahead in terms of the different tasks on hand, at work and in personal life. Pre-empting issues wherever possible; and managing with tact, the issues that come up.

Planning & Time Management: Working to a plan; and setting time for all the essentials, be it at the workplace or in personal lives.

But in order to do these, it’s important to stay objective, calm and mindful. It is this that allows us to give a logical look at all aspects.

Key components of good emotional wellbeing

Objectivity, Calmness and Mindfulness are key aspects of Emotional Wellbeing. And this is what many of us miss practising.

The earlier one learns to manage difficult situations, debates or conflicts with mindful actions, words and reactions, the better it becomes in the longer run. This in turn ensures longevity and success in the role one has at the workplace.

In order to work towards these attributes, one could do the following –

Accept that the work on hand per se may be fine and not at fault. One needs to manage one’s time and interactions in a manner that create win-win scenarios; for oneself and the organisation one works with.
Observe and acknowledge one’s own thoughts and feelings and understand one’s core needs.
Observe and review one’s emotional reactions -whether shown outwardly or kept deep within oneself. Also, be open to understand the others one interacts with.
Work on one’s own behaviour style so as to work and interact with awareness and mindfulness.

All of us come with some strong and some not-so-strong behavioural traits. Many of these come from childhood experiences that have repeated often and got ingrained. These traits make us act or respond to situations in particular ways.

Behaviour is like the tip of the iceberg. Below lie our thoughts, feelings , emotions, experiences and a whole lot of unconscious elements which we are not aware of. These need to be acknowledged and understood, in order to bring about long term behaviour change.

How could one bring sustainable changes in one’s behaviour?

While bringing awareness and observing oneself is the first step, it may not be as easy as it sounds. It is therefore useful to take the help of a mental health professional – a Counselor/Psychotherapist.

The professional’s objective, non-judgemental and empathetic approach helps us in sharing about our difficulties without inhibitions.

Often people feel inhibited in taking professional help. It is important to understand that there is nothing awkward about wanting to improve oneself in terms of self awareness and inter-personal skills.

It is similar to taking professional help in improving a sporting or artistic skill; and yet different since it is far more impactful; affecting one’s entire approach to one’s life goals, success and happiness at work and in personal life.

This is why many business organisations have consciously taken Employee Assistance Programs to help employees improve their emotional wellbeing.

How Counselling helps in Self Improvement and Emotional Wellbeing

The counselling process works in stages. It starts with using the counsellor as a sounding board, where one can speak one’s mind out without worrying and bring clarity to the issues affecting the mind.

The professional facilitates by asking relevant questions to help one probe within for answers.

At this stage, one becomes aware of the limiting beliefs that one is holding on to and how that’s impacting their behaviour.

The next stage involves going deeper within and understanding the root cause or origins of the present behaviours. Then, bring awareness to feelings that were suppressed and experiences that have had significant impact on one’s psyche. Sharing and acknowledging these with a caring, non-judgemental person sets the stage for healing.

Changes in behaviours start happening when one starts healing from within.

This is a reasonably long process and one needs patience and commitment to go through it.However, the new energy and the confidence one feels after going through this process is well worth the effort!

Working to ensure good emotional wellbeing is thus a key step towards improving results at the workplace, as well as building a healthy, peaceful and happy personal life.